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Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Three things

Ok, I’m not going to vent and whine anymore just yet. Even though our account is now more than $700 overdrawn and the credit union appears to be unwilling to work with us at all. Nope, I need to think positive and not dwell on the fact that all July 4th plans are now shot and Ron is going to be working as many overtime hours as he can to help us eventually out of this mess, which means even less time that the girls will see him. And I’m not going to beat myself up about the fact that this is ALL MY FAULT. Nope, I’m not. Honest.

Well, maybe just a little bit. But I am really trying to keep things in perspective and remain thankful for everything that we have. In the grand scheme of things, this is something we’ll look back at 10 years from now, and laugh at – I hope.

To distract myself, here’s my response to the MamaBlogga Group Writing Project. The question is, “Three things I want my kids to…” So here goes.

Three things I want my kids to… say to each other.

“Here, Hannah/Abby – you take the *insert name of toy here*, I’ll play with something else”. Now, wouldn’t this be a nice refreshing change from the “I had that first!” or “She took my *whatever toy they’re fighting about right now*!” that all of us parents are subjected to day after day? As a refreshing change or if you guys want to see Mommy’s jaw hit the floor – maybe just try it, even once? Who knows – you might even have fun with the toy that your sister doesn’t want to play with right now. I know that the yelling, pushing, grabbing, shoving, whining and tattling are all so enjoyable, and that the two of you get tired of spending all day and night with each other right now while school is out, but really, think about it. Please.

“I’m going to tell Mommy on you!” Yes, I know this is usually followed by hunting me down and reciting a litany of injustices that your sister has committed against you. But, maybe you could consider telling me that she shared her favorite toy with you, or that she drew a great picture. As a Mom, I hear every negative thing that you two do to and for each other, but I know that there are times when you have a lot of fun with each other too and I would love to hear more about some of them!

“I love you” Now I hear the two of you say this a lot. To me. And to Daddy. But I can’t remember the last time I heard either of you say it to the other. And you do love your sister. I know you do. You may not think so at times and I’m sure that as you get older there will be things that make you (and I) doubt that this is true, but it is. Believe me. You Uncle Donnie and I never said this to each other until we were grown and it was such an odd, awkward moment when we started saying it at the end of phone conversations. And it really shouldn’t be – it should be the easiest thing in the world to say. So start now. You won’t regret it later, I promise.

I know that the two (three actually – this all goes for Becca too) of you will always have conflicts and that you won’t get along every single moment. But just think – not everyone has a sister and you guys are so lucky to have 2 of them. I always wanted a sister when I was growing up and as much fun as Uncle Donnie could be, it wasn’t quite the same. You have a built-in confidante, playmate, and friend. Respect each other. Love each other. And for goodness sake, please stop arguing with each other over every little thing. My sanity just can’t take any more of it.

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7 wonderful people said...:

Jordan McCollum said...

I'm the oldest of four daughters, and while I can't really remember saying either of the first two, we learned to say "I love you" to one another, I think, in large part because my parents' families rarely said it.

Excellent list. Thanks for participating!

I hope you get through this rough time quickly!

Corey~living and loving said...

what a great spin on the writing project. I enjoyed reading it. I hope your girls survive the summer...and so do you! :)

Karen said...

Yeah, the sibling rivalry thing is tough. Where do they get that? Not from our modeling! "Waaa. Daddy left his dirty underwear on the bathroom floor again!!!!" ;)

I don't ever remember telling my siblings I loved them until we were all adults. And really, it's still just the 'end of a phone call' thing. Not that I don't love them of course!

Great post!

Deb said...

Jordan - wow, 4 girls, huh! I think that's my husband's worst nightmare.. . Well, not really, but as much as he loves his girls, I know there's a part of him that would really like a boy.

My family growing up never said "I love you", not even my parents to us very often. I make a point to tell my parents (and brother) as often as possible now and they do the same. It's sad that it took until we were adults before we felt comfortable telling our parents that we loved them - one reason why I try to tell my kids that every single day. Thanks!

elaine@bloginmyeye said...

This is a great list. One of our most important jobs as parents is to teach our kiddos to get along with each other and I know your kids, and the world, will benefit from you making this a priority. They will be better for it.

Lori said...

Great list! I'd love to hear my kids say those things too!

Daisy said...

What a great list! My kids got along best when they older. Now one is in college, and the other is thrilled whenever she comes home. I hope you don't have to wait that long.