Thursday Thirteen #27 - Ron's vacation

I had a difficult time coming up with something for my T13 list this week, but then I remembered...

Ron has next week off.

He's taking some vacation time partially because he really needs the break, partially because we'll get our tax return soon and hopefully can get caught up on bills anyway, and partially because he hasn't had a solid week off in at least the past few years. He's been working so many late hours this week that the girls have barely seen him, so it'll be good to have him home every evening next week.

There are also a few other reasons that I'm glad he'll be around next week. Here are 13 of them:

1. He'll be home all day - with nothing to do except laundry and dishes, of course... :)
   
   
2. We won't have to rely on the kindness of our neighbors to get the driveway cleared if it snows.
   
   
3. I won't be tripping over wet work boots in the middle of my kitchen floor every night.
   
   
4. Daddy can shuttle the girls around to evening activities! Ok, well at least he can help.
   
   
5. Five days of having someone else worry about what to cook for dinner. And if I'm lucky, 5 days of walking into the house and having dinner waiting for us... Hey, a girl can dream, right?
   
   
6. Not having the girls asking me every 5 minutes to call Daddy and see what time he'll be home that night.
   
   
7. Not having to get the girls out the door by myself for 5 mornings!
   
   
8. Daddy will be home to cover any snow/sick days. Which means that it will be sunny, 40+ degrees and everyone will be perfectly healthy all week...
   
   
9. The $25 or more that we'll save by having him eat lunch at home every day next week instead of buying fast food (his arteries will go into shock from the lack of grease, however).
   
   
10. Having Daddy here to read Becca's favorite Dora book to her at least some of the 549 times that she demands begs for it every evening.
    
    
11. Finding out that he actually has 36 hours of paid time off - so he will get at least a partial paycheck for the week.
    
    
12. No meter, drill or other assorted equipment charging and taking up all the space on my kitchen counters for a week.
    
    
13. Three words - "Honey Do List". Oh, Ron....... :)

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Did I walk into the right house?

In the evenings, as I round the curve on our street, I always strain my eyes to see if Ron's van is in our garage. It's difficult to tell until we get almost to the driveway, but in general if the garage door is up, then he's home and if it's still down, then I know that I'll be on my own for at least the first part of the evening, and for dinner with the girls. Abby and Hannah usually try to guess whether Daddy will be home or not, and it becomes a great source of disappointment for whichever of them guesses incorrectly.

Friday was a pleasant surprise. The garage door was up, Ron's green van was parked inside, and I immediately noticed that he had already put the garbage toter out by the curb. Given that this wasn't even our usual garbage night due to the holiday, I was impressed that he'd remembered. I'm usually the one panicking at the last minute to make sure that the garbage is out, and I'm embarrassed to say that we've missed a few pickups as well from time to time.

My next clue that something was different happened immediately when I opened the back door, into the kitchen. The spicy aroma of spaghetti sauce filled the air, and when the girls un-piled themselves from their father, I saw the spoon in his hand and realized that not only was he home for dinner - he had made dinner as well. A wonderful, hot dinner that everyone likes and will usually eat. That we could eat together as a complete family.

"There's something new in the living room!", Hannah called out to Abby. Curious, I walked to the doorway and peered into the living room. I noticed 2 things right away. First, that the cedar chest from our bedroom was back in its usual place by the front door (it had been re-located to our bedroom first by our living room re-arrangement last year and then by the Christmas tree after we put the living room back to its initial arrangement last month). Considering that the chest had been completely buried in dirty laundry (Ron's, as it was on 'his' side of the room) just that morning, I began to have an inkling that there were more surprises yet to come. This was confirmed by the second thing I saw when looking into the living room - a laundry basket overflowing with what had to be the kids' clean clothes.

Entering our bedroom, I was amazed to realize that there really is a floor on Ron' side of the bed, and that without the cedar chest against the wall, there's really quite a lot of floor there. And wait a minute - not only was the floor unburied, it also appeared to have been vacuumed as well.

I returned to the kitchen and asked the tall being who greatly resembled Ron, "who are you and what have you done with my husband?", and after a moment, I added, "and can you stay for a while?" LOL

While in the kitchen, I glanced in the sink and realized that the pile of dirty dishes that had filled it that morning was missing. Lest I worry that we'd been robbed (as if anyone would want our dirty dishes anyway), the guy who resembled Ron but clearly couldn't be my "messy, can't remember to put his own dishes in the sink much less anyone else's" hubby opened first the dishwasher (wow, I've never seen it actually completely empty before...) and then the cupboards to show me that every single dish was exactly where it belonged.

Now I was a bit scared - had he been taken over by an alien being perhaps? Or brainwashed in some fashion? I mean, it couldn't really be my husband, who I have to beg, threaten, or nag into doing the dishes, who had done all of this. And that wasn't even all of it...

Returning to our bedroom in disbelief and shock, I saw that Ron's closet door was open (a common occurrence). But when I went to close it as I generally do, I got a further shock when I glanced inside. All of his clean clothes were folded and stacked neatly on his shelves, or hanging. From actual hangers. Other things soon came to my attention as well - the carpet in the girls' bedrooms was suspiciously clean as well, and the kitchen floor was devoid of the breakfast cereal pieces that Becca had adorned it with that morning and that I had not had the time or willpower to make myself clean up for the 485th time. In the distance, I could hear the dryer merrily humming away as even more laundry was obviously in the process of being done.

The table was set, dinner served and we sat down as a family to enjoy it. And afterward, this wonderful person who had created the dinner, cleaned it up without a word of complaint.

Am I dreaming, I wondered... Is this some alternate reality that I've suddenly been transported to? For during dinnertime, it had also come out that all of the Christmas decorations (which I had taken down and packed back into their tubs - and had nagged Ron into at least carrying down the stairs into the basement, where he left them at the foot of the steps for me to squeeze back into the tiny closet under the stairs) had been put away, the ping-pong table had also been folded up and returned to its usual storage place and someone (surely not my husband!) had gone through the dozens of old videotapes that have cluttered up the computer room and had gotten rid of almost all of them (Ron collects tv shows and movies that he records on video - he's had this collection since before we met and it's taken up an inordinate amount of space in every apartment and house we've lived in). The computer room had been cleaned up and actually almost even looks like a 'real' room.

Yes, it was indeed my husband who did all of these things. On a day off from work - which he usually spends sleeping and relaxing in front of the tv, but for some reason had decided to spend, in this case, cleaning and sorting and organizing. When I recovered at last from the shock, I made sure he knew how much I appreciated his effort. And that any time he felt like repeating the feat, he was welcome to.

A mama could get used to this. Very easily, in fact. :)

Birthday surprises

So... What did I get for my birthday?

Hmmm... (thinking hard)

Did you see my hint? :)

It really wasn't that terribly exciting of a day at first - the same old, usual work stuff. I got to daycare to pick up the girls, only to discover that Ron had beat me there (my cell phone is dead so he couldn't call). So I got to go home and relax in an empty house for 15 minutes before they got there, which was very nice. Where had they gone? I knew - Ron had taken them to the dollar store. See, every year for his birthday and mine, we take the girls to the dollar store to let them pick out their presents for us. We do this at the dollar store so that they can pick whatever they want without having to worry about how much it costs. It does lead to some 'interesting' gift selections, but well - it's only a dollar (each), so no big deal or money wasted. And they get the thrill of giving us presents that they picked out themselves (ok, so I do tend to 'help' a little when I take them...).

We headed out to dinner and although the girls were a bit fidgety and irritable, it really went pretty well. Until dessert that is, when the server brought out packages of Oreos for each girl. Abby and Hannah were no problem - they'd eaten good dinners so got to break right into the cookies. Not so for Becca though. Who hadn't eaten much of her dinner at all - not more than a fry or two and not any of her macaroni and cheese. And who was now demanding, at the top of her little lungs no less - COOKIES!!!

And she would not be distracted or reasoned with - all we wanted her to do was eat one bite of baked potato (something she likes), figuring at least it would be something and we wouldn't be giving in (well not totally anyway). But nope - I think I've mentioned before how stubborn this little girl is... It didn't help that we were seated right next to a large group - a class or study group of some sort, who were trying to talk and be heard over our little loudmouth. Whoops.

Two nights of having someone screaming and crying through dinner - this can end any time now... Really! But I am proud to say that we didn't give in and Little Miss Becca went home cookie-less.

The girls gave me their gifts at dinner (unwrapped, but it's the thought that counts, right). Here's what I got from the dollar store this year:

Actually, I was rather impressed - scissors and a picture frame are pretty good for those two. I've seen some of the things they've picked out (or tried to) for Ron when I've taken them shopping for him.

So we were all done with dinner and Ron took Abby and Hannah up to the front of the restaurant where they've got a candy crane machine. I sat with Screaming Toddler who was now upset that Daddy had deserted her on top of every other indignity she'd suffered tonight. Oh those poor people next to us must've been going nuts...

I heard them returning so turned around and was greeted by Abby carrying this:


My first thought was something along the lines of, "I thought it was a candy crane machine - did they get another one with stuffed animals in it too?". Then I recognized it - I'd seen this same stuffed animal before the other day at the mall. In complete shock, I sat as Hannah handed me something.

And inside the gold bag - within the gold paper and bow, was this:

And inside the small white box, was this:

At this point, I knew what I'd find next. We'd talked about it only yesterday and I'd told Ron to wait. I meant it too - I hadn't been playing any kind of mind games or anything, I had several good reasons why I wanted to hold off on a large purchase like this. Adding another monthly payment (even a small one) to our budget right now isn't necessarily smart. If we waited a few more months, we could use part of our tax return to at least have a down payment. And with how horrible my hands look right now, I hate the idea of anything drawing more attention to them.

Even something like this...
I know - the picture isn't the best quality, but my camera doesn't do so well with the extreme close-up shots.

So what did I get for my birthday? A wedding ring set to replace the one that I lost almost a year ago. Something that I did actually pick out but then decided that it wasn't a good idea right now. But Ron didn't listen to me - and I have to say that part of me (ok, a big part!) is glad. I miss my wedding ring. I loved my ring and it still hurts to not know where it is or what happened to it. This ring isn't the one that Ron placed on my finger 7 1/2 years ago on our wedding day, but I do have to say that it's beautiful and after it's resized (so I can wear it on the correct finger!), he will place it on my finger to replace the original.

Sometimes my husband really does surprise me - and it's so amazing when he pulls it off without me having a clue ahead of time. He hasn't done anything like this in years though, and I never really even thought that he would go ahead and buy the ring after I told him to wait. Yes, my reasons for waiting were (and still are) good ones, but he came up with a few of his own as to why he thought we could manage this right now. It's not a hugely expensive ring - it cost less than the deductible would have been if we'd claimed the loss of the original ring on our homeowners insurance. But it's mine.

And who's really going to argue? Especially since it involves gold wrapping paper, a little black hinged box and sparkly diamonds... Certainly not me. :)

Thank you Ron - I love you!

Yes, we are the most boring couple on Earth.

Ron woke me up this morning. First off, that is very strange because I'm usually the one pummeling him to get him to wake up when my alarm goes off.

Alarm? Hmm, don't remember hearing that either.

Wait a minute, where the heck am I?

Oh yes... I did lay down on the couch last night right after we put the girls in bed. Maybe he's waking me up to tell me I should probably head to bed now. I'm sooo tired - it can't be morning yet.

It is? Morning? Time to get up and get everyone ready? Nooooooo....

I've fallen asleep on the couch before - fairly often even. However, this was the first time that I've ever slept the entire night on the couch as usually I wake up somewhere between 11pm and 3am and then lie in bed wide awake for another hour or two until I can finally get myself to fall back asleep.

But not last night. I do vaguely remember waking up to the sound of Ron's (very loud, obnoxious) snoring at one point - he was asleep in the recliner (lovely couple, aren't we!)... I seem to recollect staggering over to him and waking him up to get him to stop snoring and then making it back as far as the couch before I was asleep again. I have no idea what time that was...

Ron says that he got up around 3:30am from the recliner and went to bed and given my history of not being able to go back to sleep after moving from couch to bed, he just let me be.

So I slept, on the couch, from about 9pm last night until 6:30am this morning.

Why am I still so tired then?

And I woke up after the strangest, very odd, vivid dreams - probably due the fact that the tv was on all night. Maybe that's why I'm so tired...

So nothing got done around the house last night. And I feel weird - like dizzy and can't quite seem to get focused or concentrate so far today. Ugh.

Remind me not to let myself fall asleep on the couch anymore!

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"HapBirdy Daddy"

The title is in 'Becca-ese', LOL. Somewhere she picked up on how to say Happy Birthday - her language has just been exploding over the past week or two. It was very sweet to hear her wish her Daddy a 'hapbirdy' this morning.

So far the highlights of Ron's birthday have included breakfast in bed (a bowl of Trix - his request) and opening the gifts that the girls picked out for him last weekend at the dollar store. Abby picked out this little orange plastic cone that says "Wow! Wow! Wow!" on it - so that they can kick the soccer ball at it when they're playing outside (her and Daddy, that is). Hannah got him a heavy duty car sponge to use when he washes his work truck. I got him a book of Sudoku puzzles. The girls each made a card for him yesterday too when we wrapped the presents.

Tonight we'll go out to dinner at our usual haunt for birthdays - Brann's Steakhouse and Grill. Awesome food, very kid-friendly (the kids love the candy crane machine especially), and hopefully Ron's parents will be able to come with us.

We're also hoping that the baby next door may come (or have come - their van's been gone all day so we're not sure) today.

Ok, off the subject but I took Becca to the mall last night after dinner while the big girls had movie night with Daddy and found new shoes for her at Sears - Elmo & Zoe sandals on clearance for $6.99 and Tinkerbell tennis shoes on clearance also for $6.99! Her other sandals were hand-me-downs from Hannah and have been slowly falling apart all summer. And she had no other shoes that currently fit. She's very proud of her new (light-up) shoes! I also found great clearance deals on underwear and socks for the girls - it's funny how things like that make your day when you have kids, isn't it!

So a big 'hapbirdy' wish to Ron today from his 3 girls and me!

Update - Monday morning... I found out this morning how Becca learned to say Happy Birthday! Apparently at daycare the little ones like to line up stacking cups or blocks and pretend they're birthday candles so they sing Happy Birthday about 300 times a day. Which is really cute but another one of the (many) things that I'm sad I'm never there to see...

Lunch date and finances

I had lunch today - with my husband - and with no kids. We did this last week too, but the entire lunchtime discussion revolved solely around Harry Potter, as my attempts at otherwise engaging Ron in conversation miserably failed. Today was very nice though - we ate at a 'real' restaurant (i.e., one with no waiting in line to give your order and carrying your food to the table yourself) and actually had an enjoyable time that did not involve crayons, whining, food on the floor or anyone ducking under the table. What a concept!

We talked about several things - one of which was ways that we can improve our budgeting skills and keep from overspending. We came up with a couple of very simple things that we're going to try.

Back when I originally used to keep the checkbook, I tracked everything in the checkbook register, like you're 'supposed' to do. For a while I also used Quicken, but everything was written down in the register as well. A few years ago when Ron took over the checkbook, he set up an Excel spreadsheet to track everything in and only entered transactions into that. This frustrated me to no end since I couldn't just pick up the checkbook and see where things were at. Having to turn on the computer, wait for it to boot up, open up Excel, find the checkbook file - you get the idea. I thought about buying a PDA and entering in debits as I made them right after leaving the store. As much as the technical equipment-loving, geeky side of me liked that idea, I couldn't justify the cost. Then last year, it got so neither of us wanted to keep up the checkbook - it was just way too depressing.

When I came back to work last fall, I took the checkbook back over. I still use Ron's Excel file since it's handy to categorize things and be able to quickly sum up lists of expenses. Every few days, I download our transactions from our handy credit union website and update the Excel file. But, it's still been annoying that we can't see our status at a glance. We also tend to use the debit card way too just because it's - well, it's just there and much too easy to pull out and use.

So, here are our ideas from today to help get things under control:

1. First of all, that I will print out the last day or two of our checkbook transactions every Friday after I update the Excel file with Ron's paycheck information and bring the sheet home for us to refer to over the weekend (which is the biggest danger zone for overspending for us).
2. Daycare is due every Monday for that week. I've been paying it on Tuesday or even Wednesday a few times because we've 'dipped' into that money the previous weekend and I have to hope that the check doesn't clear until Friday when Ron gets paid again. Hmmm, see the problem here? Especially when I forget to record the darn daycare check and then pay other bills with that money... So, since Ron is paid every Friday, I'm going to start paying daycare on Fridays for the next week instead of waiting until Monday or Tuesday. That way the money for that comes out immediately (or at least is recorded immediately) so we know exactly how much we have left for the weekend and next week.
3. Ron eats out almost every day for lunch. Yes, this is a bad idea when you're struggling financially. Yes, it's not healthy since he eats fast food almost every day. However, I've pretty much given up the fight on this one because a) there is literally nothing he will eat that he can take with him since he is out on the road every day with nowhere to re-heat food and even with a cooler, he's found it impossible to keep cold food cold in his truck. And b) even with eating fast food every day for lunch, the guy has lost over 30 pounds since he started this job because he's so active every day. But, it's still hitting us financially. Not to mention that I'll often take the girls out for lunch or dinner on the weekends just for a change or for somewhere to go since Ron's often working. Which is more money being wasted. So... Every Friday when I leave work, I will stop on my way to get the girls from daycare and pick up $57 in cash. Of that, $25 will go to Ron for lunches and $25 for me for miscellaneous stuff (taking the girls out to lunch or to go do something fun, or snacks/lunches for myself during the week). When our weekly money is gone, nothing more gets spent that week. The other $7 will go to the girls for an allowance - something we've been meaning to do anyway. I'm thinking $4/week for Abby and $3/week for Hannah (and then having them each give $1 at church every week out of 'their' money). Hopefully this will curb the impulse spending that we do.

There's more to work on, like coming up with a regular schedule for grocery shopping - something we've really been struggling with since Ron started this job and his hours are so unpredictable. And setting a budget for expenses in general. But hey - baby steps... And I think that these ideas will help out a lot.

What budgeting/financial tips do you have that work well for your family? I'd love to know!

Becca's checkup and some updates

I just got back from taking Becca for her 18-month checkup. Wow, has this little girl grown! She's gone from a tall, skinny little thing with chicken legs to a robust toddler who actually has some plump to her now. Until her first birthday, she always hovered around the 10th to 25th percentile for weight. She is now in the 75th percentile at 26 pounds 4 ounces! And at 33 1/2 inches tall, she's in the 95th percentile for height. Way to grow, little Becca!

I'm feeling much better now, except for a lingering cough, but I think Becca may be catching my cold. She ran an unexplained fever last night of 101.5 before bedtime (although she's been fever-free so far today) and she just hasn't seemed herself or had an appetite. My little daredevil hardly let me put her down at the doctor's office and let's just say that's not like her. About the time she finally started calming down and playing with me, it was time for the shot - only 1 this time though, thank goodness. But in general, she's doing well and is healthy and all of that fun stuff.

Remember my cancorder tape-to-dvd project? Well, I am almost completely done! I have one tape left to copy - it's of our honeymoon in Florida. So far I have copied/watched over 30 hours of family video. After the first 7 hours of just Abby, it seemed to settle down into a nice variety of new babies, birthday parties, Christmas and preschool events/activities. Although we either did not record much in 2002 after Abby's first birthday or I'm missing a tape somewhere because between April (Abby's b'day) and November (Hannah's birth), I've got a total of about 15 minutes. But I'm excited to almost be done and already looking ahead to the next project that I've assigned myself - scanning all of the photos in my photo albums.

This is a bigger job that you might think. My mom started photo albums for my brother and I when we were born. At the time, all of their photos were developed into slides, so my mom made prints of the best photos for our albums. My brother never kept his up after he got older and I actually raided his for photos before I moved away from home (shhh, don't tell!). But I not only kept them up, they multiplied. And multiplied. I have almost 20 photo albums covering from my birth up to Abby's birth, when we got our first digital camera. I also got into scrapbooking at that point and have started 3 different scrapbooks - none of which have more than a few pages in them yet. Have I mentioned I have this habit of starting projects and not finishing them? Which is one main reason I'm so excited to almost be done with the camcorder tapes. And I WILL get all of the photo albums scanned! Eventually.

So in other news, here's some updates on past posts. First of all, Hannah is doing much, much better with the potty since we started using the timer. Even to the point where we've stopped using it most of the time. She's only had a couple of accidents and has even taken herself to the potty several times. She is back in pull-ups at night after ruining her mattress (that one was Ron's fault for not noticing he was putting her to bed on a bare mattress without sheet or mattress pad!). I haven't been giving her the MiraLax on a regular basis, but plan to start again because she's been complaining about stomach aches again. So we'll see if this streak goes more than the couple of weeks that it's ever lasted before. Having her 100% potty trained before school would be awesome.

I still haven't gotten a new wedding ring. It just hasn't seemed as high of a priority lately, what with everything else going on.

I finished Harry Potter on Monday! No spoilers here, but it was really an amazing book and a great way to end the series. I think I'm going to go back now and re-read them all from the beginning to see how everything fits together. J. K. Rowling is amazingly talented - I'll be looking forward to seeing what she does next.

I think that brings everything pretty much up to date! Just because I feel like it, here are a few photos from swimming lessons over the past couple of weeks. Sorry for the picture quality - the lighting isn't the greatest plus the motion makes things a bit blurry...

Harry Potter mania

I… am… tired… Probably a combination of being incredibly busy this week and staying up way too late, I guess. I was up late-ish again last night but not for the same reason as before. No, last night I was sucked into the last few chapters of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, which I am (well, was – since I finished it last night) re-reading in anticipation of the last book coming out tomorrow night at midnight.

Yes, I’m a Harry Potter fan. And I’m not ashamed to admit it, although in general I tend to avoid things that are way too popular. I refuse to buy crocs for either myself or my kids because even though everyone in the world has them (so it seems), they remain among the ugliest shoes I have ever seen. I was one of the last people I knew to see Titanic when it came out just because I was annoyed by all the hype.

But I love the Harry Potter books. Yes, the movies are good too, but it’s hard to cram pages and pages of detailed writing into a 2+ hour movie and have it both cover all necessary plot lines and be enjoyable enough to hold people’s attention. And I get annoyed when things get left out that I think are important. My regard for Harry Potter probably has something to do with the fact that I’ve been reading constantly since age 5 (Yes, I was always the kid in school with ‘her nose in a book’) and one of my favorite genres is young adult Sci-Fi/Fantasy anyway. Authors like Susan Cooper, Lloyd Alexander, Madeleine L’Engle, and yes – J. R. R. Tolkien and C. S. Lewis.

I am not an obsessed fan like my husband who counts down the days until a new book or movie comes out starting months ahead, visits HP-related websites regularly, and who is taking a full day off of work on Monday – just to read book 7. An unpaid day, mind you. No, I just enjoy reading the books. I will not be dressing as my favorite HP character or in line at 11:30pm to snatch up the next book as soon as it’s out (although Ron will). Part of me doesn’t even want to read the last book, because then the magic will end. As much as I want to know the ‘end’ of the story, I also know that it probably won’t end the way that I think it should (many book and movie series endings, like tv show finales, are so unsatisfying), and I will miss some of the speculation and guesswork. But not Ron regaling anyone who will listen with his theories about how Harry is a Horcrux or that Dumbledore created one when he drank from the cup (just wait for the darn book and you’ll find out anyway!). I do have theories, but I’d rather keep them to myself and wait to see how right I am.

Apparently, copies of book 7 have been inadvertently released early and have shown up on the internet. For those interested, here is a site that lists all of the current news and rumors (no spoilers though, thank goodness!). I do have to admit to taking a quick peak at the scanned pages of the Epilogue that were leaked, but that was before I knew that they were probably real. Now I wish I had just let my curiosity go, although I do have a bad habit of sneaking looks at the last few pages of books when I just can’t stand the suspense of knowing what happens. In just under 40 hours or so though, we’ll all know. But who’s counting?

So to vent or to sleep...

It's almost midnight and I should definitely be asleep. Especially considering that I have to be up in under 7 hours. And that I've got as busy of a day tomorrow as I did today. But I'm tired, frustrated and really need to vent. So here I am.

I had a fairly rotten evening. I won't bore you with all the details and there wasn't one major thing that went wrong - just a whole bunch of little things. You know how that happens sometimes and by the end of it you're just... done. So in a nutshell, my frustrations of the day (in no particular order, although somewhat chronological, I guess).

1. Ron brought Abby and Becca home from swimming last night and while the kids made it into the house, the towel that Abby had used (mine since she left hers at VBS) did not, nor did the diaper bag.
2. I accidentally turned my alarm clock off this morning instead of hitting snooze so got up 10 minutes late and to work 20 minutes late. Funny how that multiplies, isn't it.
3. As I was 10 minutes away from being done copying 75 GB of data from our network onto an external hard drive, we had a brownout at work. Instead of sorting through multiple folders and files to figure out what hadn't copied yet, I just started over again, so what should've taken half the day ended up taking the entire day.
4. I had only one option (hot dogs with no buns) to feed the girls for dinner and was in such a rush that I completely forgot to feed myself anything. By the end of swimming, I was starved and grouchy. We were late to swimming because I had to throw together a makeshift diaper bag as well as the usual bag of necessities.
   
5. Hannah slipped on the wet floor in the locker room and bruised her thigh pretty badly on the way in to swimming. Becca got her fingers pinched in a door after swimming, while we were waiting for Ron.
6. Becca did not sit still AT ALL during swimming lessons, so I spent the entire 45 minutes chasing her around the bleachers instead of watching Abby and Hannah. It seemed hotter than usual in there so I was not only starving, but dripping with sweat by the time lessons were over. (wow, this list is longer than I thought it would be)
7. Ron had 'hoped to make it' in time for open swim after lessons were done. I called him afterward but he wasn't answering either of his phones. So we waited in the hallway for 15 minutes before giving up and heading home. Abby went from asking me every 10 seconds, 'did you talk to Daddy yet?' to screaming and wailing that she wanted to stay for open swim and see her teacher.
8. Hannah lost her towel somewhere at the pool.
9. Somewhere about here my head started to throb.

Came home, ate a bowl of cereal. Then another. Finally got a hold of Ron - he should be home in an hour. Got Abby and Hannah in the bathtub to rinse off from the pool (usually they rinse in the showers there but I was in no mood to stick around any longer than we already had). Distracted a little toddler who thinks she needs a bath anytime someone else is in the tub or shower. Collected wet suits to wash, realized that we now have lost both of the girls' towels in the past 2 days. Completely forgot that we are out of bread and there isn't much else left in the house food-wise either. Called Ron multiple times since it's been an hour plus but he's not answering again. Put Abby and Hannah to bed. Abby has misplaced one of the two teddy bears that she absolutely cannot sleep without. Tell her to wait, while I put Becca to bed. Search for teddy bear with no luck.

Ron finally shows up at 9pm - Abby is still awake frantically searching for her teddy bear and I can't deal with her anymore, so he somehow convinces her she can sleep this one night without it. He brings in the diaper bag and towel and starts laundry, then disappears downstairs to the computer room. Probably a smart idea given my frame of mind at this time. And I'm not even PMSing!

Finally remember at 11pm that we are out of bread and that there is nothing else we can send to VBS for the girls' lunches, not to mention my lunch. Argue with Ron about who is going to run out somewhere for bread. I ALWAYS go whereas his point is that it's 11pm and he's tired. And I'm not??? Grumpy husband stomps off to the store, flings the loaf of bread on the counter when he gets home and goes to bed. At least he did get the laundry in the dryer earlier. I make the girls' lunches and my own, finish the dishes and sit down here since I'm now too keyed up to sleep.

I think part of what makes me angry is that Ron knows that he can get away with not doing things around the house because he knows I'll step in and do them. But I can't just 'not do' something because there's no guarantee that he'll even know it needs to be done, much less do it. And if I ask him to do it, I get a guilt trip or accused of nagging. There are things that just simply need to get done in any household and he knows that I'll pick up the slack if he drops the ball. But if I drop it, it shatters and things go horribly wrong. So I keep juggling all the balls up in the air and I don't even know how to juggle.

Wow, I'm more tired than I thought. Somehow I'm even getting loopy. At least that's better than frustrated and angry. I think I'd better go to bed. Good night!

Oh yes... Abby swam the entire way from the diving board to the opposite end of the pool. Somehow something clicked today that hadn't before now and she's actually 'swimming' on her own. I am so proud of her!!!

Trivial Pursuit, anyone?

So can you tell I’m having a slow day at work today since I’m here blogging… Anyway, I promised the story of how Ron proposed and I didn’t want to leave it hanging.

So, a few things to know first. Ron is very into trivia and (at least back before we had kids) liked buying and playing different versions of Trivial Pursuit. At the time he worked for Kinko’s (now FedEx Kinko’s). Also, the story of how we met involves two other couples – my close friend Kristi and her husband, Steve, and Ron’s friend Jean and her husband, Chris. Not to confuse anyone (although I’m sure I will – see if you can follow this…), but basically Kristi and Chris were friends before and while Chris was dating Jean. Kristi played the piano in Chris and Jean’s wedding. While I knew of Chris and had met him a couple of times (and Jean once), I really didn’t know him well. Ron was a friend of Jean’s and he was a groomsman in her and Chris’ wedding. Basically, everyone (but me) was at this wedding, the summer of 1998. A few months later, Chris and Jean got everyone who had been in their wedding back together for Jean’s birthday. Again, I wasn’t there, but apparently somehow it came up that Kristi had this single female friend and Jean mentioned Ron (who was at the other end of the table) who was also single. One thing led to another which led to them asking Ron if he would want to meet me. He said sure, but wanted Kristi to make sure it was ok with me first. The first I knew of any of this was when Kristi asked me out of the blue whether I was interested in meeting this guy who had been in Chris and Jean’s wedding and was a friend of Jean’s. I had gotten out of a messy relationship over a year before and hadn’t really dated since, so said sure. Kristi said she’d pass my e-mail address along to him. He then e-mailed me and we talked over e-mail and phone for a couple of weeks before we met in person, in October of 1998.

The night after our first date, Ron went home and told his dad (he lived with his parents at the time) that he’d met his future wife. It took me a few dates further before I was sure, but by December, we were looking at engagement rings and planning a future together. I picked out my ring (well the set – the diamond engagement ring with 2 small diamonds on one side and the band which had the 2 small diamonds for the other side of the larger one), and knew that Ron had purchased it (the lovely joys of credit!), but didn’t know when he was planning to propose. The only things I asked were that he wait until after Christmas so it wouldn’t seem quite so rushed to my family and I really didn’t want it to be a huge deal, more a quiet, private proposal. Well, even though he failed on both counts, I still ended up saying yes anyway. ;)

So, Ron had gotten the new (at the time anyway) version of Trivial Pursuit – I can’t remember specifically which right now. He was all excited to get together with our friends to play it, so we all planned a game night over at Kristi and Steve’s apartment, 2 days before Christmas. The 6 of us (the two couples mentioned earlier, plus Ron and I) started playing the game. I didn’t know this until later, but pretty much everything about this particular game of Trivial Pursuit was completely planned out and scripted, down to who went first and who pulled which trivia card from which box. I was the last person to read a question on the first turn. I forget which category the question was for, but it really didn’t matter. I got as far as reading, “At what time on December 23, 1998 did Ronald S. ask Deb H…” and I just remember thinking in my head, wow this version is really up to date! Then I realized that both Ron’s and my names were on the card so I looked up in confusion. At this point, Ron got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. After I said yes, and he put the ring on my finger, everyone else started laughing at the completely dumbstruck look I’d had on my face. We do have pictures somewhere – I believe my face was a bright, beet red. I’ll try to dig one up – or maybe not. :)

So I guess that Ron had hatched the plan and got the other 4 people to buy in. He dummied up the Trivial Pursuit card at work (Kinko’s remember – the center of the photocopying world) – hopefully I’m not violating any copyright things here, but the card was only used that one time and has resided in a box of wedding keepsakes ever since. I think Ron laminated it though. It looks exactly like a ‘real’ card from that version of the game, but the question for every category (since one thing they couldn’t predict is what color the person I would read the question to would land on) was some version of, “At what time on December 23, 1998, did Ronald S. ask Deb H. to marry him?” I think I wrote the answer down on the card somewhere later on – Ill have to see if I can find it. The 5 of them then planned out the game, down to who sat where and that everyone would answer incorrectly so that I would hit the right card in the box at the right time. Somehow I missed out completely on the tension in the room that night – they were all waiting to see if it worked out. It did – perfectly. I was completely clueless. And even though it wasn’t the quiet, after-Christmas proposal that I’d asked for, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So Ron does have a history of surprising me. Although, now that I think about it, other than that time and one surprise birthday party the following fall, he hasn’t really done a big major surprise since. I think I’m due a good one then! I’ll have to drop some more ring hints…

Oh, in case you’re wondering – the game of Trivial Pursuit never was finished. Nobody really had wanted to play an actual game anyway, so once the proposal excitement was over, we skipped the rest of it. We are still friends with the other 2 couples, even though Chris and Jean now live in Wisconsin – Kristi and Steve live about 10 minutes away from Ron and I, and we get together on a regular basis. All four of them were in our wedding in May of 2000 and we 3 couples now have 6 kids between us (our 3 girls, Kristi and Steve have 2 boys, and Chris and Jean have a daughter).

And yes, I have surprised him too on a couple of occasions, but that’ll have to wait for a future post since this one is getting rather long and I really should get some work done. :)

Lost and (so far not) found

This past January, I lost my wedding ring. I loved this ring, so that even when it didn’t fit on my ring finger anymore (ahem, those pesky baby pounds that just never came off darn it), I wore it on my pinky. Now keep in mind that I wore the ring on my pinky from the time I was pregnant with Hannah (who is now 4 ½) until I lost the ring. I was used to wearing it on that finger and was comfortable with it there.

January 15^th was Martin Luther King, Jr. Day and I had the day off. So, of course, I was all over town running errands. Becca and I went to pick up the girls’ photos at JC Penney (at the mall across town since the JCP at the mall close to us doesn’t have a portrait studio). We stopped at Party City to get party supplies for Becca’s 1^st birthday party. I stopped and filled the van with gas. Then we met Ron, Abby and Hannah over in the Barnes & Noble at the other mall (Ron had taken the big girls to a movie at that mall), walking through the mall to get to B&N and back. Then we headed to McDonalds for dinner.

It was while I was walking into McDonalds that I noticed that my ring was gone. When (and where) it vanished, I still have no idea. I searched our van and around it in the McDonalds parking lot (as much as I could search through snow and slush). I went back later that night to Barnes & Noble and searched through the bathroom garbage dispenser where I’d tossed Becca’s dirty diaper that I’d changed there earlier (not the most fun I’ve ever had). I called every store I’d been at. Nothing. For the first week or two, I felt optimistic that the ring would turn up – either in our van or someone would turn it in and I’d get a phone call. Nothing. Then I thought well maybe it’s buried under snow somewhere so maybe once the snow melts in the spring, it might turn up. Nothing. And still, 5 months later – nothing. I’ve read the ‘Lost and Found’ ads every week, although I never placed my own since trying to describe where the ring might have been lost would’ve been way too difficult. I called the stores back after a couple of weeks just to make sure they still had my contact information. I searched through our van several times. I still have no idea where the ring came off, although I tend to believe that it must’ve been shortly before I noticed it was missing, because I think I would’ve noticed it earlier if it had fallen off earlier.

So as our anniversary approached last month, I started to drop hints to Ron about maybe replacing it. Not that I want a new ring – I want the ring that he put on my finger when he proposed (which is another great story that I’ll save for a future day) and that he added the band to on our wedding day. It wasn’t a huge diamond or a terribly glitzy ring – but it was mine and I loved it. And I miss it. Not to mention that walking around with 3 kids and a bare left hand is an odd feeling, at least to me.

We did go to the jewelry store on our anniversary and looked at rings. We have to use one particular store that we have an account at (which was opened when he bought the original ring over 8 years ago) since neither paying for a ring outright nor opening another credit account are feasible options right now. I have this problem where I don’t want just a plain, cheap band or something ‘less’ than what I had before. Something comparable would be nice – I don’t really need anything bigger/flashier. Unfortunately, my husband seems to have forgotten how much the original ring cost him and was facing some major sticker shock – although I’m not sure exactly what he was expecting to spend since the cost of the ring that I liked was not only comparable to the original, but quite a bargain I thought. However, he has a point that an extra $60 a month is an expense that we don’t need right now. Which is true, so I’ve let it go for the moment. I keep hoping that he’ll just surprise me with it (again, I’ll go into our proposal story sometime soon since you have to understand that I have reason to think that he might attempt a surprise of some sort). But – nothing. I really shouldn’t complain, I know. Not having a wedding ring is a pretty minor complaint as far as things go. Part of it is that I’m still angry with myself for losing my original ring in the first place. And hey – what girl doesn’t want a sparkly diamond, right? Even a small one. So now that I’ve vented here, I can continue to let it go and find other things to worry and stress over. And I promise I’ll share our proposal story soon – it’s a good one.